I am super excited to be part of the blog tour for Hopelessly Devoted to Holden Finn and I have Holden's audition transcript for Every Which Way the band to share with you.
Synopsis
There’s only one man for Bonnie, and that’s Holden Finn.
The problem is that Holden Finn is a twenty-three-year-old pop megastar with his boy band, Every Which Way, and has no idea she exists. Not only that, but half the women in the world want to be Mrs Finn, including Bonnie’s teenage daughter, Paige. The real men in Bonnie’s life do nothing but let her down, but a man you can’t possibly have can never do that… right?
Then Paige wins a radio competition to meet Holden and the band, and Bonnie’s carefully-constructed world starts to unravel. She is about to find out that you should be very, very careful what you wish for …
Note from the author and Audition Transcript
When I first thought of writing about Holden Finn, I was a little worried. His public life is easily accessible, but the information available from the usual sources consists of only things that his management want us to see. I knew that if I was going to portray Holden Finn the man, as opposed to Holden Finn the public persona, I was going to have to do some serious digging. And although a lot of my detective work ended up in frustrating disappointment, his private life being better guarded that the Colonel’s Secret Recipe, I did find one little gem which I thought I would share with you. So, here it is, never been seen before, the transcript of Holden’s audition for Every Which Way…
SATURDAY, 11TH MARCH, 2.30PM. INCREDIBLY HOT BOY ENTERS AUDITION STUDIO. VISIBLE DROOLING FROM FEMALE MEMBERS OF MANAGEMENT TEAM. SIMON NODS HEAD KNOWINGLY AT LOUIS. BOY TAKES THE SEAT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM IN FRONT OF THE PANEL.
SIMON: Hello and welcome. What’s your name?
BOY: Hi, my name is Holden Finn. I’m twenty-one and I’m from Bournemouth.
SIMON: Bournemouth? Nice part of the world.
HOLDEN: I think so. But of course, I’d like to see a bit more of the world.
LOUIS: Is that why you’ve come today?
HOLDEN: Yes. I want to be in your band. I want it, so much you wouldn’t believe.
SIMON: That’s what they all say, Holden. The question is, do you want it enough?
HOLDEN: I’d sell my granny to get a place in this group.
SIMON: Fortunately, we’re not looking for grannies.
HOLDEN: Alright then, I’d sell my balls.
LOUIS (LAUGHING HIS HEAD OFF): You might need to do that at some point.
SIMON: Oh you definitely need balls if you’re going to work with me.
LOUIS: You need a voice too. People say you can form boy bands on looks alone, but not with us. You need to be a fantastic singer.
HOLDEN (DOES THEATRICAL SWISH OF HAIR): So this mane isn’t enough? (GIGGLES FROM FEMALES IN ROOM)
SIMON: I hope that isn’t your way of saying you’re wasting our time.
HOLDEN: You want me to sing now?
SIMON: No I’d like you to go and prepare me a lasagne.
HOLDEN: Really? (MORE GIGGLING FROM FEMALES IN ROOM)
LOUIS: Go ahead, Holden. What are you going to sing for us?
HOLDEN (GETS OFF CHAIR): Right Said Fred’s, I’m Too Sexy.
SIMON (EYEBROWS RAISED TO THE POINT WHERE THEY MAY POP OFF HS HEAD): I hope you’re joking.
HOLDEN (LAUGHING): Yeah I’m just messing with you. (RUNS A HAND THROUGH HIS HAIR. AUDIBLE SIGHS FROM FEMALES IN ROOM). I’m going to sing Our Song.
LOUIS (NODS HEAD IN APPROVAL): Brave choice. If you pull this one off I’ll be impressed.
HOLDEN (GRINNING): Oh don’t worry, I will.
HOLDEN BEGINS TO SING. FROM BACK OF THE ROOM THERE IS A LOUD THUD. ONE OF THE FEMALE MANAGEMENT TEAM HAS FAINTED. THE OTHER WOMAN FAIL TO NOTICE AS THEY GAZE AT HOLDEN. HOLDEN GLANCES AROUND BRIEFLY, GRINS, AND CONTINUES TO SING. SIMON TRIES NOT TO SMILE AND LOUIS LOOKS AS THOUGH HE MAY PASS OUT AT SOME POINT TOO. SIMON HOLDS UP A HAND TO STOP HOLDEN.
SIMON: I think we’ve heard enough.
HOLDEN: What did you think? Am I in?
SIMON: Better get those balls polished, because you’re the last member of Every Which Way.
About the Author
Tilly Tennant was born in Dorset but now lives in Staffordshire with her slightly nutty family. Tilly is married to Mr Tennant (not that one, though a girl can dream). She likes
nothing better than curling up in a quiet corner with a glass of wine watching the world go by, but can more usually be found taxiing her daughters to parties or taking them on emergency shopping trips. After a huge list of dismal and disastrous jobs over the years, including paper plate stacking, shop girl, newspaper promotions and waitressing, she began working as a temporary secretary in a hospital to boost her income whilst doing a degree in English and creative writing. This job lasted nine years. Not terribly temporary. But it does mean that she knows just what it’s like to make monumental admin cock-ups, spend the month’s wages in the hospital coffee shop and fall in love with all the doctors. As she’s a smug married, however, it’s fortunate that the doctors in question don’t usually feel the same way.
Tilly is represented by the wonderful, gorgeous Peta Nightingale at LAW.
Hopelessly Devoted to Holden Finn is available to download from Amazon UK
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